Dear Readers:
Dr. Ink has a vision of himself as a boy sitting around the kitchen table with his family, eating Sugar Pops and drinking sweet milky tea, and reading the pages of Newsday or the New York Daily News. This archetype of eating and reading abides deeply, and Doc finds it impossible to resist. He and his wife, the delicious Inka, still read the paper at the breakfast table, interrupted only by occasional questions from her.
Women do not believe that men can read the paper and listen at the same time, so the evolved Doc puts down his paper and looks soulfully into his beloved’s eyes when she is speaking. (What Inka doesn’t know is that some men have the ability to look you in the eye and appear attentive while conjuring Mickey Mantle’s 1956 Triple Crown numbers.)
So powerful was Doc’s association of reading with eating, that he not only devoured books as a boy, but he also voraciously read cereal boxes if the paper was not at hand. Sometimes the back of the cereal box would offer descriptions of the prize inside, or something bigger and better that could be acquired by mailing in dollars and boxtops. (Doc wishes he still had a nifty boat-in-a-bottle, obtained from an old Rice Puffs promotion.)
All good things pass, and Doc stopped reading cereal boxes the day he realized he could read the paper, watch TV, check his e-mail, and listen to his wife Inka at the same time. Then, a few weeks ago a cereal box caught his eye, not just because of its purple and yellow colors. Kellogg’s Raisin Bran (Two scoops!) has produced a cereal box designed to be read by adults — the same Baby Boomers who were once hooked on the genre of the cereal box.
“Great Quotes” says the headline on the back of the box, with a request to “Match the famous person with their quotes.” (Doc will overlook the disagreement of number.) A total of 18 quotes are listed beside the names of famous writers and speakers. If that were not compelling enough, Kellogg’s offers a bonus on the side panel: 10 more quotes. Three of Doc’s favorites:
“Opinions cannot survive if one has no chance to fight for them.” — Thomas Mann
“Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length.” — Robert Frost
“Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.” — Will Rogers
What is going on here? Food for the mind and body that is high in fiber?
Do you eat and read at the same time? Ever read cereal boxes?
