Should bosses play favorites? Should they give plum work assignments, opportunities for growth, better schedules or personal attention to some staff members over others? My answer is yes, provided they do it for all the right reasons, and make those reasons transparent to everyone in the organization.
The term “playing favorites” has a ring of unfairness to it, no doubt because of all the bosses who favored certain employees over others for reasons that are clearly wrong.
Here are some of the WORST reasons a boss might anoint a staffer as a favorite:
- You’re an employee I hired, not one I inherited.
- You remind me of me; we share the same gender, ethnicity, politics, religion or age.
- You and I share the same outside interests — things like golf, parenting, fantasy football or travel.
- You and I share the same vices; our stolen moments in smoke breaks bond us.
- You are a talented employee and a me-first bully who has enjoyed kid glove treatment; I don’t have the guts to challenge you.
- You’re a favorite of my supervisor, who is blind to your flaws; I haven’t figured out how to right that wrong.
- You’re a world class suck-up and your flattery is irresistible.
That takes us to the BEST candidates for “favorite” status:
- You’re a high performer who makes superior contributions to the organization and does so collegially. (In other words, you’re not a diva.)
- You’re a talented staff member who demonstrates commitment to growth and learning; your work and learning ethic are noteworthy.
- Your talents and performance are exactly what we need to showcase as we’re managing change in the organization.
- You’re a problem-solver who looks out for the team’s best interests.
- You’re a boundary spanner, someone who builds bonds across silos in the organization and looks for opportunities to improve the work.
- You’re “buried treasure,” a staff member who, for some reason, was overlooked by previous managers and deserves an opportunity to finally shine.
Now, here’s the tricky part. Sometimes, an employee can fit into both categories. That high performer may also be the same gender or ethnicity as you, the boss. That boundary-spanner may be a bit of a suck-up, visibly sending positive feedback your way more than others. That “buried treasure” may attend your church.
Unless managers make it absolutely clear to the staff why they give certain people coveted assignments, shifts or attention, I guarantee that the rest of the staff will attribute it to the WORST reasons. The manager’s respect and reputation will be diminished among staff. The favored employees may be criticized or ostracized by their peers.
Worst of all, bosses who fail to educate the staff about the people they reward miss an opportunity to teach them how they, too, can rise in the organization. Great bosses know there’s a limit to the perks and promotions they can offer staffers, so they make the process by which they award them absolutely transparent and the values behind the process known to all.
While I believe it is fine for bosses to play favorites for the right reasons, there are also land mines they should consider. I share some warnings in our three-minute podcast: “What Great Bosses Know about Playing Favorites”:
Poynter’s “What Great Bosses Know” podcast is sponsored by The City University of New York Graduate School of Journalism. Poynter’s leadership and management expert Jill Geisler shares practical information that’s valuable for bosses in newsrooms and everywhere.
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